After making so much noise for last couple of months, BCCI has settled for UAE a.k.a fixing heaven as one of the three venues, along with Bangladesh and India, to host Indian Premier League this year. The reason given out in the public is the security concern due to impending general election in April-May.
Many cricket fans were not happy with decision considering the recent image of IPL and the history of UAE which is considered as betting and fixing capital of cricketing world since ‘80s and 90’s. It is precisely for this reason that BCCI had black listed UAE at the turn of this century and were hesitant (till recently) to play international cricket there.
On to the decision now, our very own Pagal Patrakar has managed to dig out the real reason behind IPL’s UAE sojourn.
When asked about the venue, BCCI president N Srinivisan said: “See the point is, and you need to understand, that my astrologer came up with this idea of UAE as host. He told me this after consulting many cricket enthusiast (read: fixers and bookies), including Gurunath and his good friend Vindoo, about the venue. Hence we came to the conclusion that UAE is the best alternate option as we do not want to hurt the feelings of ‘cricket enthusiast’. After all it is they who run our (cricket) business.”
When Pagal Patrakar asked Srinivasan to elaborate further on the logic behind this decision, CSK boss said: “See the point is we all believe in unanimous decision, you can go and ask Mr. Haroon Lorgart also. We always prioritize cricket enthusiast above anything. Moreover it will also benefit cricket me as now I am ICC boss, so CSK can get home ground advantage.”
When cricket enthusiast Gurunath Meiyappan came to know about this decision, he seemed elated: “Yeah, I am extremely thankful to my father-in-law who took this decision and honoured the wish of us cricket enthusiast. Since first phase of IPL won’t be in India, Indian laws will not apply on me so I can sit in dug out and help my fellow enthusiast.”
We were in for a shock when MHA sources revealed that apart from security reasons there were political reasons also behind UAE move.
Home Minister Shushil Kumar Shinde revealed that UAE was chosen as avenue to trap Dawood Ibrahim who, like Meiyappan and Vindoo, is also a cricket enthusiast to he will come and watch matches.
Shinde said: “Yes apart from logistical issues and security concern there was also a consideration on how to bring Dawood back to India. So we saw this IPL as an opportunity to nail him. We have our team ready and this has been kept secret so Dawood this time does not get opportunity to flee. Yes one more thing we have been able to plan all these because of Sonia Ji and Rahul Ji’s blessings.”
Rahul Gandhi, who otherwise is quite media shy, also gave a quote on this decision: “Yes Sushil Kumar Shinde came up with this India and I approved it because he also promised me to give 50% reservation to women in his team for this operation. It will help us in achieving women empowerment. Without women India cannot progress or become superpower!”
Well for once there was unanimity across party line as it was even welcomed by BJP’s PM candidate Narendra Modi, but criticized it for omitting Gujarat offciers. Modi said: “Mitron, I welcome Shinde Ji’s decision, but would like to ask him why no one from Gujarat is included in the search team. Yeh Gujarat ke sath anyay he! You know me and Amit bhai (i.e. Amit Shah) both are very when it comes to encounters. You need to go and look at our past record in Gujarat! We are very good at even snooping and stalking. Mitron, people of United States of Gujarat call me James Modi.”
Well so our readers would now have got a fair idea on why a fixing heaven was selected as venue for first phase of IPL.
