Steve Harmison Reveals Contemplation Of Suicide In His Autobiography ‘Speed Demons’

Apr 6, 2019 at 2:11 PM

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Steve Harmison Reveals Contemplation Of Suicide In His Autobiography ‘Speed Demons’

England fast bowler Steve Harmison in his autobiography ‘Speed Demons’ has revealed a bitter truth, stating he was considering to commit a suicide following battling with depression during his international career.

The Ashington-born bowler Harmison’s autobiography is being published in series by Daily Mirror in which he has penned down how he felt separated while failing to make most out of his success.

“It was clear I was clinically depressed and medication would be the way forward. I’ve been on it ever since,” Harmison was quoted by AFP.

The 38-year-old right-arm pacer Harmison recollected that he was taken by surface after depression got better of him, as he had to consult the psychologist in 2004, in order to restore his normal life.

“It was the same story – only worse. I was in no position to celebrate. I was in no state to do anything,” Harmison maintained.

Harmison revealed he was jolted when he had flown abroad with the teammates, as he went on to feeling hapless at times.

“The horrible truth was those same feelings, which had consumed me on trips abroad, were overpowering me again – and this time it had nothing to do with being away from home,” Harmison asserted.

Interestingly, Harmison was considered as one of the best bowlers particularly in the Test format which was echoed by Australian spin maestro Shane Warne.

Harmison, who has left an impact early on, at the international circuit, was not the only player, who felt the bouts of depression from England.

“England won all seven Tests but as that summer went on I could feel the brightness growing darker,” Harmison revealed.

Making the admission of frightening, Harmison revealed he consulted the then England team’s doctor Peter Gregory before meeting the psychologist, who asked him, whether you tried to harm yourself when depression overpowered you.

“The honest answer was “Maybe”. I can’t say there haven’t been dark times where I thought it would be easier if I wasn’t here,” Harmison expressed.

In 2005, Ashes Test series, Harmison bagged 17 wickets to help three Lions in claiming the coveted title against Australia.

“Fast forward to the great summer of 2004, when I was number one in the rankings for the Test bowlers,” Harmison remarked.

While making his International debut in 2002, Harmison has bagged 76 Tests in 58 One-day Internationals before announcing his retirement from international cricket.

Harmison has bagged 226 wickets in 63 Tests which is spread over 115 innings at an average of 31.82.

In the recent past, former England stars; Marcus Trescothick, Andrew Flintoff, who has written the foreword of the book, has also complained about stress factors and the demon of depression.

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